Friday, December 17, 2010


Image borrowed here

“There is nothing more hateful than not to go where one should, just like a herd of sheep who march along not to where they should, but to where they are accustomed to go.”

(Seneca, On the Happy Life)

I sat silently as I watch everyone attend Christmas parties and post ‘officially on Christmas vacation’ statuses on Facebook. I’ve been working my ass out since yesterday on a final requirement that is eating away my precious vacation. Hopefully after Tuesday next week, it is not too late for me to savour this special season intended for His coming.

Rooster Masses (Filipino: Simbang Gabi) started just yesterday so for sure there’d be a flock of parishioners going to church every morning. I wish I could also complete the nine Masses before Christmas utterly not out of popular tradition but out of necessity. I’d be a total hypocrite if I’d say I’ve been a good Christian this year because heck it’s been like a roller coaster regarding the inconsistencies of my deeds.

*sigh* I just feel ashamed of myself. If there is only a mask that could bury my tears and identity right now I’d buy one. It’s been hell of a year for me chasing after something I’d eventually regret in the end. I’ve done things I should not have done. Broke my heart twice on the process and got myself entangled in a web of sin and degradation.

Worse, the price for all of that is the perspective of a child I once had. Perhaps it’s the reason why I feel numb about this Christmas coming; the reason why I ache from time to time in silence. Maybe my soul is trying to tell me something...


  1. wooh! hindi pa ako nakakapagsimbang gabi. exam kasi.

  2. yun oh... complete the simbang gabi ha hehehe :D

  3. @Ester Yaje: huwaw :) student ka rin pala :)

    @Axl: aish. hinde na nga eh. siguro next year na lang uleh :)

  4. Another feature which the Gods offer as a clue is very foreboading and ominous. Mt. Zion is a mountain to the north of Diablo (the eye of The Beast) and one which has a working quarry at its base. Consistant with the decay we experience in society, Mt. Zion is being eaten away, slowly stripped of its resources, until one day paradise will be gone forever.

    So many people don't care about global warming. They disregard the need for conservation and instead drive SUVs. They don't care about the Federal deficit/debt (outside of partisanship) and they don't care earning $400k for an $80,000/year job will eventually bankrupt the country. They have awarded themselves $400k pay and retirement packages, loading up their friends on the payroll during the boom 90s through the real estate bust while all services which the program were intended to fund now get cut to pay for it.
    These people are often common public university labor. Not Ivy League, not private university.
    This labor isn't good enough to command the salaries they are earning. And they understood this when they applied to the public university they settled on.
    You can't expect a top-tier salary with a second-rate education.
    They think they are going sometime during/at the end of this life, and disregard the poor souls who are left behind.
    Sounds like the Italians who were used to plan World War II and the Holocaust, and not by accident.
    These are the people who will be here in the United States when bankruptcy is declared and society deteriorates into chaos. And they will deserve the anarchy which ensues.

    Continuing the push for privatization, reinforced and supported recently with enormous public sector salaries and retirement packages.
    Once achieved the gods will utilize the corruptive predisposition of the private sector economy, as seen with the sub-prime/bailout fiasco, to initiate economic catastrophy and initiate the bankruptcy proceedings of the United States.
    Whether the cure for cancer/diseases or the permanant resolution of economic misery, before the gods remove these motivations to pray we will experience an inordinate deluge of each element, with economic misery being perhaps the dissallusion of the united States with bankruptcy.

    The gods used the Italians to ruin life in the 20th century.
    The gods used the Italians to ruin life in A.D. with The Church.
    The Church controlled Western Civilization. As the largest land owner in Europe they controlled the monarchies. They were responsbile for slavery, revenge for African invasion and rape of Italy. They created religious discontent, ultimately leading to the disfavored dumping ground known as the United States.
    And each generation of these Italians were sold on "earning", only to be reincarnated as a lesser life form subsequently, punishment for their evil.
    "The West Bank, where the end of the world will begin." With xtianity.

    The gods are the commensurate rapist pathology, focussed on control. Be it animal migratory patterns, growth rates for plants and trees or human behavior::::The gods feel compelled to control these phenominah, whether it meets their strategy or not.
    It is appropriate they picked the Italians for the downfall of man. The perception offered is exactly how the gods are. Unfortunate for the Italians, they were deliberately altered to match this pathology so the god's behavior could be justified in the context of the god's positioning.


What do your active brain cells perceive?