Unnatural

I just realized that it is neither a phase nor a state which I am going through at the present. It is rather a condition and a temptation that I must bear and fight for the rest of my life. I will never be content and at peace until I get every bit of its grip off my system. Everything may sound utterly vague but please bear with my rants which perhaps do not make any sense to anybody at all.

I pray for a new way of seeing things. I pray for that slap in the face that could jerk me off of this liminality.

Classroom Scenario: A Filipino Post

Parang araw ng paghuhukom kanina nung tanungin ni Prof B kung natapos ba ng klase ang mahabang listahan ng Design Schemes na binigay niya lang nung isang araw. Wala namang makasagot at gustong maunang magpresent kaya idinaan na lang sa kamay ng tadhana. Nagbunutan na lang kami at kung di ka naman ba saksakan ng swerte at ang yours truly pa ang nakabunot ng ‘number 1’ na magpepresent.

Kumulo ang tiyan ng mga groupmates ko sa kaba at ako nama’y napadasal na lamang ng taimtim sa kung anong mga sasabihin ni Prof sa preliminary stages ng ideas namin para sa project.

Lumipas ang mahabang paghuhukom kung saan nakatanghod ang buong klase sa gawa namin at wala man lang akong narinig ni isang salita ng dagok sa aming puri dahil sa aming likha. Hay grabe. Abot langit ang pasasalamat ko dahil anghel sa pagki-critic si Prof. Kaiba sa mga nauna ko noong mga Design professors na nila-lambast ang iyong buong pagkatao.

Bad news is marami pang dapat i-revise lalo na ang mismong Master Site Development Proposal namin na “mukhang hindi pinag-isipan.” Natawa na lang kami dahil ito pa naman ang pinakamahalaga.

Good news ay sobrang nagandahan si Prof sa powerpoint presentation (very important ito when presenting your ideas to prospective clients) na ginawa ng yours truly (applause! Yehey!) that he even told the rest of the class to get a copy from our slides para tularan nila ng bonggang-bongga. Na-flatter naman ako dahil yun ang pinaghirapan ko nung isang gabi. To think na gawin nyang standard ang gawa ko at ipagdikdikan sa ibang grupo na dapat ganun din ang hitsura and manner ng presentations nila ay isang malaking kaluguran sa aking part.

Enjoy ako dahil bisi-bisihan na uli kami sa Design. Kailangan na talagang career-in ang lahat ng mga ginagawa if I am that determined to make it to my thesis next semester. At maraming-marami pang dapat ayusin at iimprove sa part ko bilang isang architecture student. I’ll make the best out of this semester. Ooh, am so fired up!

Lottery Win

I congratulate my beloved brother and sister for passing the recent Civil Engineering Board Exams :) Haha. They just won't stop jumping and my mother even belted as if she won the lottery. I'm so happy and proud of them. Yehey. We now have a licensed engineer in the family!  XD

Archi-Torture

Image borrowed here

Tuesday. A scene from a Design 8 subject...
Professor: Submit the following Design Schemes for a fish port development that will be located in Bgy. Canlanipa, Surigao City:

• Project Description based on the data provided
• Conceptual Master Site Development Plan
• Conceptual Master Site Development Section
• Conceptual Aerial Perspective and other spot perspectives with caption
• Rough Space Programming Table
• Behavioural Analysis
• Rough Cost Estimate
• Consider the Seven Stages of Experience
• Design concepts, building systems and technology to be used
• Fish Port Case Study of your choice

Student: Ser kelan pasahan?
Professor: Sa Friday. Naka-pdf/multimedia presentation.
Student: (naluha na lang sa isang sulok perpetually) I wanna die na...

Site Review: Teacher's Pwe - A True Pinoy Brainiac

Gudmorning Teacher Mots!

Sabi ko sa huling post ko, gagawa ako ng listahan ng best Pinoy Blogs na aking minamanmanan lately. Haha. But I couldn't think of any blog na tatalo pa dito sa isang 'to na nakahuli sa ang kiliti bilang isang estudyante :)

Introducing Titser Mots na nagpakilalang '(nagpapaka-dakilang) teacher, (feeling)illustrator, (insekyur na) middle child, (madman na) madman' at author ng Teacher's Pwet - ang aking bagong tinitingalang pinoy blog na walang pakundangang naghahayag ng kanyang buhay bilang isang guro. Binudburan ng mga super cute exploited fez ng mga batam-batang estudyante (young minds na pag-asa ng bayan. *naks*) at mga cartoon illustrations kaya hindi lang sya masarap basahin, masarap din lang sya titigan. Truly endorphin-inducing na oh so good for your health pa:) Try nyo!

More powers to Teacher's Pwet! Weee! Makakaasa ka sa wagas na pagsubaybay ko :)

Creative Juice #018: My Try on Pinoy Humour Writing

Sige lang sa pag-exploit ng mga personal pictures sa Web.

Iba na talaga ang nagagawa ng unlimited company broadband. Haha. Madaling araw na (Harujusko. may pasok pa bukas) at sige pa rin ang blog-hoppin' ko sa Pinoy blogosphere. Nag-eenjoy naman ako ng bonggang-bongga sa pagbabasa ng mga kalokohan at may sense na mga blogs at heto't sinusubukang magsulat (inggitero talaga kahit kailan) gamit ang lenggwaheng natumbok ng mga eyeballs ko.

Siguro sa susunod eh gagawa ako ng list ng best Pinoy blogs na aking inii-stalk lately. Nagtatanong pa rin ako sa kawalan kung papaanong sa maikling panahon eh nagagawa ng ilan na manghakot ng mga readers and followers ng walang kaeffort-effort. Kumpara sa aking apat na taon ng dumadaldal at dumudugo ang ilong sa pagpapanggap na mag-Ingles at heto't iisang dosena pa rin ang nakabuntot. Nyahay. Kulang lang siguro ako sa pagpiga ng sabaw ng utak. Chos lang.

Anyway. I better go. Bibingo na naman ang mga pores ng mukha ko sa kanilang exponential pimple production. Hay. Sa darating na pasko ay wala na talaga akong ibang mahihiling pa kay Santa kundi ang isang makinis at pang-commercial na complexion ng mukha. Yung parang kay Papa Piolo.

ArchInspire #013: 20th PhilConstruct 2010

 

   

That's me with two beautiful engineers from gsn+p architecture studio, the same firm I had my internship last summer. I was ecstatic to see them. I just missed them so much :)

My friend and I spontaneously ended up in SMX Convention Center in Mall of Asia Complex last Saturday to visit the Philconstruct 2010: Event 20th Philippine International Construction Equipment and Building Materials Exhibition and Technology Forum held annually during this time of the year. The event is from November 11 to 14 and the visitors who came that afternoon is surprisingly large given that it was the second to the last day of the affair.

It was the first time I attended Philconstruct so I'm quite stumped on what to expect. I should’ve foreseen though that what I’d witness is strikingly similar from that of a typical WorldBex Convention. The place is undeniably much better than the World Trade Centre, yet there are things that I guess will never change during this kind of events.

As superficial as it may seem, I am actually talking about the accursed sticker ID that loudly tells everyone I am just a puny STUDENT. It's a tried and tested sales rep repellent. They will instantly accuse you (at least silently in their heads) as creatures hungry and hoarding for product brochures, sample material swatches and business calling cards. They won’t waste their time on you knowing that you are not a prospective client. Saddening and intimidating. *sigh*

I had quite a time at the end of the day. It's already an accomplishment that I was able to memorize my way to and from Mall of Asia (tatanga-tanga kasi ako sa directions). It's those glaring eyes of sales reps that I can't get off my head. Oh, the horror.

Lesson learned: It’s not really about the volume of brochures you have accumulated that matters. It is ultimately about the knowledge and wisdom that you’ve gained from a brush stroke of the real-life industry.

ArchInspire #012: Architecture Humour

 

Haha. This made my day :) 

Click on the image to see the original size.

Objectives

 Image borrowed here

This must be the nth time I have seen myself flabbergasted when someone tries to inquire about my goals and objectives as an architectural student. I am already in my second semester of studies as a fourth year undergraduate yet I still have not given it much thought as to what I really wanted from my life and where do I wanted to go from here. Well, I’m quite sure I’m not the only one juicing my brain out trying this quintessential question and I’m not sure the following really is much of an objective but here goes. 

• To give back the love my parents invested in my taking up this course in terms of finance;

• To apply the knowledge and wisdom I have gained throughout my college days to the community I have been chosen to serve having elected as one of the youngest council member in our barangay;

• And to ultimately continue loving and serving God whom I’ve always believed the one that gave me this passion and direction in life.

Prior to our subject course orientation last meeting in Architectural Design 8, I’ve never made an effort to concretely put my objectives in words. I would have to agree with our Design 8 adviser, Architect B, though, that without these objectives that serves as your framework in life, you are distinctively similar to a free-floating being whose feet do not touch the ground.

I really do not trust my own desires. That is why I am in constant discernment as to where He wanted me to go. But looking from where I am now, I’ve made it this far by His guidance. And I know He will lead the rest towards my finish line.

I guess that is all I can say for now.

Bitter Remarks on Dating

Image retrieved from Google

After my recent date with a text mate I met in an online dating site, I don’t think I still consider myself to be officially in the dating scene on contraire to what I have stated before in my recent posts, since, aside from a few people I’ve met in person; it was technically the only date I’ve ever been to.

But judging from how everything went including the series of events that led to my first exclusive meet-up with a stranger, I have come up with a list – a bitter list that is - that you’d only probably hear from someone who is as gullible and ignorant as I am being a newbie in this field:

• It has always been about your outward appearance. They’d say they go for your personality but most of them would probably ask for your Facebook profile first to see if they’re really into you. An inevitable deed no one tries to admit.

• How one looks in a retouched picture-perfect primary profile photo is SO much different from how one looks in REAL life. People (including me) have developed personal techniques on angling their face away/toward the light source so as not to capture some of the most obvious facial blemishes.

• Exchanging sweet nothings in text messages is not so much a sign that they are into you. Don’t get yourself overly excited and do not entangle yourself too much from a person that you only forced to believe you quite knew. So chill.

• People will almost say anything just to get what they really wanted even going to the extent as pretending that they care but in reality, doesn’t.

• In the dating scene, the motto is, ‘There’s a lot of a fish in the sea.’ Well, only those who are prepared to take in as much heartbreak from countless variety of underwater nemo’s will survive this setting.

• Reveal as little or as subtle personal information as possible to protect you from future possible stalkers and fanatical psycho-lovers.

• Online dating sites in our country have a nasty connotation for such places brimming with people who are craving for instant gratification (Oh yes, I could truly testify to that). People from these sites aren’t looking for real love rather they only crave for gullible persons who are easy enough to get in bed.

The weird thing is, kahit alam kong may mga kumag talaga out there na wala nang ibang inisip kundi makipaghook-up, naniniwala pa rin ako na deep inside eh mabubuti rin naman silang mga nilalang. Hindi ko alam kung dun ako sa pananaw na yun sumablay. Perhaps, it is the very reason why I keep holding on when everybody else seemed nonchalant in letting go.

Boring Day: Intellectual Jerkoff

Image borrowed here; featuring a newspaper dress made from 30 copies of the 'Financial Times' by designer Gary Harvey

The second semester of my studies as a fourth year architecture student officially starts today. But sadly none of my professors seem to mind when not even one showed up. Haha. It has always been like that every start of the sem. So I ended up hanging out with my good old friends doing absolutely nothing all afternoon but listen to songs in their cell phones and blabber on the latest news in town (I was completely left out because I haven’t been watching the evening news for weeks) posing as intellectual Joes in an absolutely stimulating session of intellectual jerk-off. We ventured into issues about the big television networks that randomly ended up in politics and the country’s economy, topics that I shamefully know little considering the realm of local governance I’m about to embark in.

At that moment I suddenly realized that I have no right in any case to be ignorant in such matters. If I really wanted to be good at this I really should take some time to be informed by bringing back my old routine of reading broadsheets.

Oh boy, this is just the beginning.

ArchInspire #011: Manila Heritage Files

I was doing a clean-up of all the files I've accumulated last semester when I came up with this folder of photos from our Manila Heritage Walking Tour as a requirement for our subject in History of Architecture. Then I remebered that I was supposed to feature this photos nga pala in my blog as I promised in one of my posts last August. Hehe. Pasensya naman. Panu kaseh ngayon lang talaga nagkaron ng time para mag-upload.

Anyway, this photos were actually the ones we did not include in our report because what we really intended in that tour that we organized ourselves was to photo document old churches in Manila built around more than 50 years ago. Pero makikita naman natin na as we go along our way ay hinde maiiwasang makakita ng mga ganitong senaryo na hinde mo talaga mapigilang kuhanan dahil sa taglay nitong kalumaan. Hehe. By the way, these we're all taken inside the famous walled-city of Intramuros.

We tried to focus on the details kaya ganyan yung mga kuha. Sobrang na-appreciate ko dito talaga yung style and function ng Spanish Colonial Architecture sa Manila na madalas eh nakikita ko lang sa mga photos sa Web :) And in fact, this was actually my first bite on the old architecture of Manila kaya thankful naman ako sa professor namin for letting us experience this field work.

Try kong i-upload next time yung mga pictures nung mga lumang simbahan na kinunan namin during the tour. For now, ito na lang muna. Hehe.

Perspective

It’s all a matter of perspective. Bagay na dapat ay matagal ko nang napagtanto bilang isang architecture student. Isang eureka moment na naman ang aking naranasan kanina habang nakaupo sa tronong puti.

I am presented here with great opportunities and yet I’m holding myself back for an alternate choice na alam kong hindi rin naman maganda ang patutunguhan. Sa mga bibig na rin naman niya nanggaling na sa ngayo’y ayusin ko muna ang lahat habang may panahon pa and choose to mess up na lang kapag may karapatan na akong sumablay.

Today is a new day. Pakakawalan ko na muna sya dahil sa totoo lang ay ako lang naman ang ayaw bumitaw. I have got to shift my focal point at once if I really wanted to succeed in all the things I do. Pasukan na namin sa Monday. Nalalapit na rin ang turnover sa December. Kelangan ko na talagang magseryoso sa buhay ko.

Tatlong semester na lang at gagraduate na ako. Tatlong taon pa sa public service ang gagampanan ko. Hindi umuurong ang panahon. I’ll go with the flow and keep my head in the game.

---

“The world pays attention too much on a character that a majority possesses which is somehow in the negative. It is sad because people with good character often get sidetracked. And it builds deep pressure on one’s esteem making them harder to reach out and get noticed. Only few people do notice. And much, only few people pay careful attention to understand and to realize that the time spent in knowing them is actually worth it. Perhaps it feeds the soul.”
The Feisty Feline

Trial and Error

Image retrieved from Google

I had a meaningful chat with one of my greatest friend (si Feisty Feline) last night. Nabasa nya kaseh yung mga recent posts dito sa blog tapos ayun yung one of the main topics namin kagabi na natapos hanggang 5 ng umaga. She shared wonderful insights and truly a different perspective sa mga pinapasok ko ngayon offering words of wisdom that I would preferably hear from one of my male friends, but unfortunately, sa kanya ko lang talaga naririnig yung mga ganung salita.

Truly, she was heaven sent. Haha. Sa kanya pinadaan ni Bro yung mga sagot na pilit kong kinukulit habang nasa Adoration Chapel kahapon. Na-appreciate ko naman because it has given me a lot of peace and so much to think about.

Sa akin na rin naman nanggaling that the reason for signing up in that online dating site was to quench my longing for reciprocation. But once again, I was reminded that I shouldn’t be chasing one love after another like it was just a game of trial and error, and just patiently wait for a little longer when the right person, the one who was truly destined for me, arrives.

Wala pa uli akong natatanggap na mensahe sa naka-date ko kahapon. Perhaps we are all trying to figure things out. Kung hinde na sya tuluyang mag-reply, titigil na talaga ko sa mga pinaggagagawa ko. Last na talaga 'to. Pramis.

Did You Get My Message?

Image retrieved from Google

Sa wakas. Na-meet ko na sya :) Masaya ako kasi pumayag sya kahit medyo biglaan yung pagyaya ko ng first meet-up namin. Hindi naman sa pagmamadali pero naisip ko kasi na kung hindi ngayon na medyo hindi pa busy sa school eh kailan? Yun nga lang nabitin talaga ako kasi kelangan na niyang umuwi ng 12p. Hay. I would love to spend a day na kasama lang sya.

Daldalan kami while eating breakfast talking randomly about sa work niya and about further plans in the future sa field na gusto niyang ipursue. I shared my views too about my field and how I’m not making plans at all and just going with the flow. In fairness, makabuluhan naman ang naging usapan namin. Casual talk lang talaga. Malaman ang mga sinasabi niya which talagang nagustuhan ko. Siguro sakto lang yung ganun for a first date. Hindi kami dumako sa usapang pag-ibig though I wish I could have been more courageous in opening up the topic.

But now that we’ve seen each other in the flesh eh kinakabahan naman ako. Masaya ako dahil alam ko ngayon na hindi na lang sya isang konsepto; na isa syang totoong tao na humihinga, nabubuhay at nangangarap na katulad ko. But now I’m being bugged with countless questions that I think is normal when you put yourself out there in the dating scene. (Actually, sya pa lang ang kauna-unahan kong naka-date ever).

Lalo akong mas naging interesado sa kanya after this meet-up and I would love to know as much and as intimately as I can tungkol sa kanya. I am hoping na sya na yung tao na sasalo ng lahat ng pagmamahal ko. Somebody I could focus my love on and share my whole world with.

Sana rin we’re on the same page. Ayoko mag-assume katulad nung dati para hindi na ako masaktan.

Hay. Sana magreply sya sa mga messages ko.

Movie Review: The Last Song

Medyo marami-rami na ring movie ang natetengga sa laptop kaya ayun inuunti-unti ko na rin panuorin yung iba na matagal nang pinagdada-download ng kapatid ko. And truly, what a great way to start my semester than to watch a very inspiring and refreshing movie like 'The Last Song'. Haha. Nagbago ang paningin ko kay Miley Cyrus dahil dito ay na-expose talaga ang beauty and talent nya. Ibang-iba sa tween pop sensation na si Hannah Montana na madalas niyang ginagampanan at kung saan sya nakilala. Galing nya magpiano :) nakakainlove. And ang ganda pati mismo nung beach side location na ginamit sa shooting. Haha.

Anyway, ito ang highlight ng post na ito. Yung kissing scene kung saan ako kinilig-kilig and me uploading a video clip (that is not from Youtube) for the very first time:

Hindi ko alam kung legal ba yung pag-upload ng mga ganyang clips pero well, siguro tatanggalin ko na lang if ever. Credits to the movie itself na lang. Haha. By the way, gusto ko rin pala yung soundtrack nung scene na yun, did you happen to know the title of the song and the artist who performed it?

Candles and Flowers

Image borrowed here

Just got back home from Batangas. Parang joke lang talaga yung pag-uwi namin. Overnight lang yung ginawa namin. Isang basa at maputik na bisita sa sementeryo at umuwi na rin kami (ugh. It rained non-stop the whole day). Hindi kasi declared na holiday tomorrow kaya ayaw namin makipagsabayan sa dagsang pasahero na babalik sa Manila from the different provinces.

Sayang nga hindi ako nakapagsimba eh. Ang sa akin ay yun na ang pinakamaio-offer ko sa mga relatives namin who passed away. Now I’m starting to question the age-old culture of Filipinos na magsindi ng kandila at magdala ng bulaklak sa mga puntod ng patay sa totoo lang kasi ay hindi ko na talaga makita ang significance nun when we should be offering Masses and prayers na lang for their souls.

Anyways, na-enjoy ko naman makipag-bonding sa mga chikiting kong mga pamangkin na ngayon lang ako nakita sa buong buhay nila (cheers kay Duday, Buboy, JV, and Athens! Hehe). Truly, I’d rather spend some quality time with them kesa naman sa makipag-lamay ng buong magdamag sa sementeryo ranting about the lack of purpose over the prevalent tradition.